Wednesday, 12 October 2011

Poo Fairy

I suppose really that in my line of work, most of the jobs I am asked to undertake are peculiar in their own way. 'Tis a peculiar profession, after all. But now and again (mostly again) something really odd comes along that snatches the proverbial biscuit.

Such as a Poo Fairy.

It's hard to ignore an email which contains the words "poo fairy". It just sort of demands to be explored. Within, the Scapa Flow Landscape Partnership Scheme explained that dog poo is a real problem across our shores here in Orkney. Furthermore – and somewhat inexplicably – it seems many dog owners actually go to the trouble of 'bagging' it before then tossing it to the roadside nonetheless, thus creating a festering little package of stink that far outlives the obvious and unpleasant problems generated by even 'au naturale' dog poo. Who would do that!? It beggars belief. (Sometimes I am proud to be a cat owner).

Anyway, this character will appear on information boards posted along some of Orkney's many fine coastal walks. So take heed. And if you should witness a dog owner attempting to increase the half-life of an abandoned pile of dog poo by swaddling it in a plastic bag, you have my permission to strike them deliberately and repeatedly around the face and throat. (Though probably not the permission of the SFLPS, it should be said).